My natural skin tone is blue, blue in the winter and red in the summer, well unless I cover up totally in a thick white layer of factor 50 sun cream. My little man is being baptised on Sunday and I am wearing a nice summer dress, so out comes the fake tan, I am not good with fake tan! My husband has to apply it for me, not just on the bits I can't reach but all over cos I'm so crap at it I wind up looking like one of Willy Wonka's little workers. My skin goes red in the sun and then orange with fake tan, I never get a "golden glow", I never look like I've visited St. Tropez, unless the beaches in St Tropez are filled with people wielding water pistols full of orange paint.So what do I do? Usually I'm so pale and quite happy to be pale but, for special occasions I do like to cover up the blueness of my legs with a bit of a glow. Maybe I should embrace my deathly pallor, it was very useful indeed in my days as a goth, maybe I should return to that! Give up on trying to look healthy and just accept that some people were born to be white!
5 comments:
I'm white and proud, I must admit. Considered fake tan for my wedding but in the end I was too afraid of mishap!
I do prefer to keep my legs beneath the rock they belong under, however, especially at this swollen moment.
I'm a bit lazy abour hair maintenance as well. All hte ladies who wax in rollercoaster have me worried - should I defur myself for the sake of my midwife? Given the likelihood that she's probably going to see me poo myself, will it lessen the blow if I have a smooth arse while doing it?
Apologies - I'm not quite at the pristine Christening stage yet!
I never use fake tan on myself but we have a spray tan machine for Grace. It never works out right though. (Probably just me using it wrong). She's had it done professionally and that turned out crap too though.
Have a great day at the christening, and enjoy yourself!
Jo, I always found that funny, as if the midwife is gonna be happy you waxed.... Jesus, if you aren't pooing yourself you aren't doing it right!! Seriously, my last two i had natural birth, was induced but no pain relief or interventions, would have loved a home birth but having high blood pressure that wasn't an option, Poo is part of birth, if you don't poo then you aren't pushing right!
Ash, I have looked at those machines, but I think either your skin tans or it wont.... no inbetween. I should tan great, dark colouring, my family tan,but i don't!
There was too much poo in that last comment, sorry! But birth isn't pretty.....ever, it can be a beautiful experience, but never it's messy!
What a good husband YOU have!!!!
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