Karma Vampires!

I have invented a new way of being, I'm not thinking positively I'm doing positively! Lets hope it's paying off. I am feeling positive, I'm acting positively and I for the first time feel "responsible" for my life!



My problems are the people I thought were my friends, I thought they were there to support and help me, how wrong I was! Now I will clarify here, most of my friends are amazing and have been the lovely cheerleaders I needed, But some other people I thought I would have considered friends have turned out to just want me to be unhappy. A lot of the steps I've done to improve my life seem to upset some people.

Like what? Well losing weight, going to the gym, therapy, trying to make new friends and attempting to date! Basically changing my point of view from a helpless, "I didn't ask for this life oh poor me" to "I am taking responsibility for my life and my reactions to the things that happen to me". "They" don't like this, "they" feel uncomfortable with me making changes, maybe because it throws light on some uncomfortable facts about their lives? Maybe it's that I have been in a rut for a long time so the people I attracted into my life were of a similar mindset.

Now I've changed my thinking and my doing and I've noticed that I'm attracting different experiences and people into my life. Part of it is that I no longer as blinkered, and I see opportunities to make a new friend or try a new experience!

My parents, now I love them deeply but they are so negative, on one hand they want me to be OK, but then they react badly when I am feeling positively. Imagine I'm laughing, telling a story and they deliberately bring up the fact that I'm a "deserted wife" (which isn't true by any means) But what they are saying is...."don't be too happy, now remember to be devastated". I actually think my parents and some other people think that if i am happy, if I move on then I am "letting" my ex partner "get away" with something! Now this I don't understand, because if I am depressed and wallowing in self pity he is gonna move on anyway! He isn't going to say, "oh gosh, I hurt her, I'll come back", which even if he did I wouldn't want him back!

I am happy with my new life, now with it comes a lot of responsibility and fear of the unknown but this new beginning is a very positive challenge, it is an amazing opportunity to mould my life into a life I will be proud to live! Now I have my down days, but that's natural. I just wish people would put aside their own anger and hurt to be the cheerleaders I need right now, is that too much to ask?